I am definitely not someone you would call a social butterfly. In fact, most people I know, I don’t really want anything to do with. My adviser, my parents, and some dudes I have dated attribute this to the fact that I am so wrapped up in my own shit (finals, quarter grades, napping…) that I am just over all disengaged with people my age. I blame it on my sister. Anne was basically my first friend, and its hard to compete with her, let me say. Not only is she brilliant and funny, but she is smarter than just about everyone else I know and so, therefore, I have little patience for frat humor and the laziness that basically plagues my entire generation. Don’t get me wrong – I have a local bar. It’s like a fucking cheers episode in there and my lovely, brilliant, girlfriends and I have been sitting there planning a very rocking wedding, as of late. But, regardless I am, as my mother would say, “definitely not out there.”
The point – It is not unusual for me to be asked to co-chaperone school events, since the people I work with don’t count graduate school as a “thing”. I am unmarried, have no kids, and live locally, so my colleagues assume that I really don’t have anything going on. And frankly, its not a bad gig – minus the fact that unlike my public school contemporaries, I get no stipend, no PTO, and basically end up footing most of the weekend myself (how could I possibly let a forgetful kid go hungry?), my kids are sweet and super nerdy, and don’t cause too much trouble.
But this is the final straw, I tell you. I have to knock off my people (read: boss) pleasing ways! I have been suckered into THREE overnight trips this year, and shocking, all the co-chaps have cancelled on me. So, yeah. Here I am in Parsippany, rolling solo while my students debate the finer (?) points of Herman Cain’s 9-9-9 plan.
The flip side of my anger is this – if I weren’t willing to give up a weekend during finals time (and another right after the holidays, and then my President’s day weekend in the spring) who would take these kids? Without financial incentives, who would help these kids realized their super-nerdy dreams of debate team? Of the leadership roles we demand that they take on to get into the best colleges? Of opportunities to meet other super-nerdy kids and spark nerd love, or at least start networking – which as we know is the foundation of success (read: white privilige). So I’m here, in the lobby, on my third cup of coffee, trying desperately to write a final that is due in about twelve hours while encouraging my students to kick some “Should we get rid of land mines in the DMZ” ass.
One of the girls said this morning, “Ms., if you were married, you wouldn’t have to do this every year.” A fair point. And its not that I don’t enjoy watching these kids thrive in their particular nerd environment (I was president of the community service club in high school, after all), its just that someone else should appreciate this opportunity, too.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to figure out twenty more pages on Puerto Rican Education After the Civil Rights Movement.
Love sparking some nerd love…